Life is too short to have your feet in two places at the same time and too long to keep your feet in the same place for all of it. We should strive to be progressively present; meaning, we are completely present where we are as we move forward through life. How often do we hear, “I don’t know where the time has gone!” or “life is a whirlwind right now.”? When our focus is on progress and moving forward, it is easy to miss the small things along the path that make the journey worth it. On the other hand, if we sit down and stop traveling along our path, even with all the appreciation in the world for the things around us, we will never receive the gift of experiencing the little wonders the rest of the journey has for us. It is the habit of being where our feet are while keeping our eyes on the road ahead.
So the big question is, how do we make sure we don’t miss this life that is passing by right in front of our eyes?
Triangulate
I grew up on the coast in Florida and loved surfing any opportunity I had in High-school. The first time I ever went surfing was with a buddy who had extra board and most of the time was spent paddling around, somehow always seemingly to be in the wrong place to catch a wave. I would see a nice wave and immediately paddle over to where it just crashed just in time to turn around and see another big wave in a different spot. Most of the day I felt like I was just chasing waves, and while others seemed to effortlessly be in the right place at the right time, I was exhausted and only getting lucky with a few sub-par waves. The second time I went surfing was with a mentor who had been surfing for years and after paddling out, one of the first things he said to me was “you need to learn how to triangulate. Find your surf break, then find a reference point so you can make sure you are not drifting.” he pointed out a blue umbrella on the beach and the 3rd notch in the pier’s railing. The blue umbrella was my latitude reference point and the notch in the railing was my longitude reference point. When I caught a wave, I knew the exact spot to paddle back out too. I had a couple things outside of myself that gave me feedback if I was drifting. If got distracted somewhere along the way and ended up outside the break, I now knew how to get back on track. I wasn’t having to guess if it was the right spot and I wasn’t chasing after a new spot when I saw someone else catch a good wave.
When we find reference points in life, we are able to get back to the place we need to be. For some of us it is a true friend who is able to see right through us. For others, it shows up in other areas of life like exercising, reading, or something as small as making our bed. If we are in a healthy place those things are happening, but when we start to notice them being compromised, it is our warning sign that we have drifted a little bit are not putting ourself in the place to catch the wave.
Appreciate the little things:
Another way we can become more present is being thankful for what is right in front of our face. It brings the present into focus. It is impossible to be truly thankful for something in front of you, if you are checked out or living with your mind in the past or the future. It’s no secret that there is power in generosity and appreciation. When we appreciate something or someone, we are more likely to be generous with our time, assumptions, and attention. In doing so, what we are giving ourselves too, become more rewarding for us as well.
My wife and I have a puppy who loves attention. If I am sitting on the sofa next to our little Italian Greyhound and I am on my phone ignoring her, she will either come lay down on top of my arms or paw the phone right out of my hand. If I set the phone down and give her a few minutes of attention, she obviously loves it, but its a rewarding experience for me as well. If I continue to ignore her, normally she reverts to chewing on something she isn’t supposed to, as a more desperate form of looking for attention. This is an over simplified example, but people know when they are a priority and when we are just being given lip service. One interaction at a time, we either strengthen the relationship and build trust, or we push them away and continue to drift further out of the present.
Living All In:
I don’t believe there is a lack of desire to be successful, happy, fulfilled… fill in the blank of whatever you want most. However, I do think sometimes there is a lack of belief that it is the right thing. Let me explain; anything meaningful in life requires sacrifice and normally the bigger the goal or ambition, the bigger the sacrifice. Sacrifices can be small, but they are the comforts of our everyday life. The ambition of going back to school, but the sacrifice of your time and money. The ambition of going after that fitness goal, but the sacrifice of being sore, putting your body in challenging situations and having to prioritize nutrition and recovery. If you have complete conviction about your goal, it makes even the hardest sacrifices easier, but if we have an ounce of doubt, the things we give up are much harder. I think most of us have some sort of reservation about if what we are in pursuit of is worth all the sacrifice or only when we are motivated. If we are only partially invested, we can keep some of the comforts and sacrifice when it is convenient. That way, in the end, if we fall short of the goal or worse, we achieve it and it isn’t what we hoped it would be, at least we didn’t give up all our creature comforts along the way. This thinking is the highway to mediocrity. It is the definition of average and normal. But nothing great in life was achieved through convenience, comfort, and only doing things when we want to. Maybe it is worth taking some time to really think about what we believe in and what is worth it in the end and then move forward being all in on those things. What we chose to dedicate our time to is important, but it could be even more important to be see that how we chose to interact with the things we say are important shape who we are. Living all in become the moments that make you feel alive, and even if you do fail or fall short, you know you didn’t say yes to the catastrophe of living half alive.
Life is too short to have your feet in two places and too long to keep your feet in the same place for all of it. Triangulate to be where the waves are crashing, appreciate the little things in front of your face and go live a life that is all in.
It is a gift to be alive! Live well my friends.